Livvie shut the door to her apartment with a forceful slam and dropped the plain, brown paper bag she had brought in with her to the floor as she headed straight to her bedroom to shed the clothes from her body. She stripped off her clothes she had been wearing when Jack had found her nearly dead out in the woods days earlier. Despite Livvie begging Jack not to make her go to the hospital, he had taken her to GH, making her go back to that dreary hospital so those doctors could take away all evidence of the child she had proudly carried inside her. The child she had so desperately wanted to be a mother to, a child she would have protected and loved more than life itself if she had been given the opportunity to bring it into this world. While Frank had vehemently denied that he was the baby’s father and it had been the spirit of the Avatar who had been with her that night to father her child, Livvie knew better because she had felt Frank touch her in ways she had only imagined a man could make her feel when they had been together. Frank Scanlon was fooling himself if he actually thought that he could go back to having a calm life with Karen Wexler by his side after what they had shared with one another. Livvie shook her head trying her best to dispel the sight of a very concerned looking Frank leaning over her while she lay in the hospital bed quietly telling her that their baby was gone. 

I see a red door and I want it painted black 
no colors anymore, I want them to turn black 
I see the girls walk by dressed in their summer clothes 
I have to turn my head until my darkness goes 

After putting on another outfit, Livvie tossed her previous outfit she had worn into the trash so she wouldn’t ever have to have those garments touching her skin again, doing her best to rid herself of any reminders of when she had heard the news that all of her hopes of having a family were gone. Rafe was now her ex-husband and had run as far as he could from her after their sham of a marriage had ended. In all honestly, Livvie was glad to be rid of him knowing the only reason Rafe had seemed half way appealing to her in the first place was due to the fact that she knew Alison would be miserable if Livvie could take him from her. After the challenge of taking Rafe from Alison was gone by getting Rafe to marry her, the victory Livvie had envisioned having over Alison hadn’t brought her any real joy or sense of fulfillment on her part. Rafe Kovich had only been a pawn in her plan of revenge on Alison Barrington, her former best friend and confidant, nothing more nothing less. 

Why she had ever thought she and Rafe could be a happy family together raising her child was a mystery to her now. If only she hadn’t of tried to poison Alison she would still have her baby growing inside her even if she would have had to raise her child all by herself. She felt the hot tears coming to her eyes as the thoughts of how her special child would now never be held in her arms, sung sweet lullabies by her or to be rocked gently to sleep safely nestled in her arms. 

I see a line of cars and they are painted black 
with flowers and my love both never to come back 
I see people turn their heads and quickly look away 
like a new born baby it just happens every day 

All her plans had went so wrong and now she was facing what she had feared most in this world and that was to be utterly and completely alone, with no one to love or care for her. The choices she had made regarding her life were ones that she couldn’t go back and fix with a simple “I’m sorry” and shed a few tears of remorse for everyone to forgive her. If only her father were here beside her then things would be all right, for Kevin always loved her regardless of her misdeeds and wrongdoing she may have done to others, he would understand and forgive her right now and be offering her comfort if only she hadn’t of mistaken him coming into her apartment that night for Frank. She’d never meant to hurt Kevin by her actions, she’d only wanted to teach Frank a lesson since he had threatened to blow her plans for having a perfect family out of the water. Frank had driven her to take desperate measures and now she had destroyed her father’s life too with her machinations. 

I look inside myself and see my heart is black 
I see my red door and it's heading into black 
maybe then I'll fade away and not have to face the facts 
it's not easy facing up when your whole world is black 

I wanna see it painted painted, painted black, oh baby 
I wanna see it painted painted, painted black, oh baby 

Having to face up to the cold, hard facts of her deeds was too much for her to deal with at the moment, so she reached down to grab the bag she had dropped earlier onto the floor and pulled the glass bottle from the bag. She tore off the wrapper that surrounded the neck of the bottle and opened it swiftly, wanting to block out all the rage and hatred that had slowly been building up inside her for months now. She took a big swig of the dark liquid straight from the bottle, feeling it burn all the way down her throat as she swallowed, wincing slightly as the alcohol started helping her escape the pain she carried with her constantly. 

She knew she shouldn’t be drinking after the lecture Chris had given her about taking care of herself earlier in the hospital, but she didn’t give a damn what he or anyone else thought of her. They all could go to hell as far as she was concerned because not a single one of them gave a damn about her anyways, least of all Jack whom she thought would eventually take her back, but he had made it clear to her in no uncertain terms that there wasn’t even a slight chance for them to reunite in this lifetime. 

No more will my green sea go turn a deeper blue 
I could not foresee this thing happening to you 
If I look hard enough into the setting sun 
my love will laugh with me before the morning comes 

The more she thought about it, the more convinced she became that what she had planned to do this evening was the right thing. She got her pocketbook and extracted the package she had managed to steal from the hospital today before she had been dismissed. Livvie poured out the vast array of brightly colored pills into her hand and thought to herself that the nurses really should be more careful with their keys to the drug cabinets because she had gotten these drugs without too much strain and effort on her part at all. 

Livvie looked around her apartment one last time and decided she better do this before she had time to think it over anymore and back out. She thought about writing a note explaining her actions, but who would she even tell goodbye that would actually care? No one was even going to miss her so she’d do them all a favor and get out of Port Charles one way or another. Livvie opened her mouth and shoved all the pills she had held in her hand into it, then chased them quickly down by drinking more of the bourbon she had bought at the liquor store. She almost emptied the entire bottle before she leaned back against the couch, the room slowly starting to fade before her eyes as the darkness began to swirl around her. 

I wanna see it painted, painted black, oh 
black as night, black as coal 
I wanna see the sun blotted from the sky 
painted, painted, painted black oh baby 
painted painted, painted black 

He stood at her door, uncertain if he should have even come over here tonight, knowing how things were between him and Livvie, but she had just seemed so lost and alone when she left the hospital today. Images of Livvie signing out of the hospital and walking off all alone had kept coming back into his mind all afternoon. He didn’t know why he had felt compelled to stop by other than the nagging thought that something was more off with Livvie than normal, then again what was normal in this town anymore? Over the past year he had seen more than his share of strange coincidences and tragedies to do him in for an entire lifetime. Maybe he should just go before he intruded into her life and made himself look like a fool. He had almost turned around and left when he heard a thud on the other side of the door. 

He walked back to her door and knocked on it, getting no answer, only dead silence greeting him for his efforts. He knocked harder, hoping Livvie would come to the door and answer it, but she never did. 

“Livvie are you in there?” he asked and when she still didn’t answer the door he decided that something was wrong since he had swore he had heard something only a few moments before. He took a deep breath and decided that if she wasn’t going to answer then door then he’d get in her apartment somehow. He leaned against the heavily and pushed it, feeling the door budge slightly and he pushed harder until he felt the lock give way and the door swung open to reveal an unconscious Livvie lying on the floor. 

“Oh Livvie, what have you done?” he asked her, kneeling down beside her lifeless form as he frantically began to find a way to save her life.