All was quiet now in the cozy loft, as the moonlight streamed in through the windows and the only occupants were fast asleep with the exception of one lone soul who made her way cautiously among the debris not wanting to awaken anyone with her presence in the room. 

A lump formed in her throat as she tried valiantly not to let the tears fall from her eyes. She straightened her stance as she forced a bittersweet smile to her lips, resolving to herself that this was not a day for tears, this had been a day of celebration in the life of her child, a milestone in his life upon which many more hopefully would come into existence for him. 

She had not been among the guests at the birthday party for her son today, at least not physically where anyone could have seen her, although she swore she saw Daniel’s eyes light up when she had entered the room. Of course she had stood off in the background, a mere observer to the festivities, looking around the room at the many faces who were so near and dear to her heart, people she had loved and cared about while she had been alive on this earth, wishing she could have truly been a part of this most special of days instead of only being on the outside looking in on what had went on today. 

She had been so proud of her little boy, watching him clumsily walk around the room, giving his guests smiles of delight as his laughter and baby talk had bubbled up amongst them all. His brown eyes, ones that looked so much like her own, had shown with pure joy over all the trappings his first birthday party had brought his way. 

Finally her time had come to spend a few moments alone with her child and it didn’t matter to her that he was fast asleep or that he wouldn’t know she was there in the room with him, all that mattered was that she could be near him for a little while. 

Eve stood in the doorway to Daniel’s room, her white outfit softly aglow as she quietly walked over to his bed. The smile on her face now was one of adoration for the beautiful child sleeping in his bed, one who was all tired out after a very long day for such a little boy. She enjoyed these precious moments, ones she would store away in her heart when she had to be away from him. 

The minutes ticked by and still she stayed, not wanting to leave yet. Eve knew her time was limited and she would be missed if she stayed much longer, but she just wanted a few more minutes watching his breath rise and fall as his stuffed animals surrounded him in the bed. With a sigh she turned to leave, knowing the wee hours of the night would soon turn into the dawning of a new day if she didn’t depart from here soon. She had almost left the room when she heard the tiny whimpering from her son as he awoke from his sleep. 

Automatically without thinking, Eve turned back to Daniel ready to pick him up when the harsh realization hit her that she couldn’t reach out to him. That was against the rules, ones that she had to go by back in the other world she was now a part of, ones that were strict against crossing over to the other side. 

Daniel’s cries were becoming slightly louder in volume as he looked upon the luminous figure standing by his bedside, feeling confused as to why the woman was just standing there doing nothing for him as he cried. He sat up in the bed and held his arms out to her, signaling for her to pick him up. 

With a brief prayer heavenwards, Eve begged for this opportunity to hold her son once more as he continued to stretch out his arms in her direction. A swirl of soft light glowed in the room and Eve felt her arms reach out to touch Daniel and to her surprise she was actually able to pick him up from his bed and hold him instead of her hands going straight through his body like they had done on previous occasions when she had attempted this feat before only to be disappointed in the outcome of her endeavors. 

A rush of gratitude flowed through Eve so swiftly that she almost didn’t believe that she was actually holding her son as she walked over to the window and sat down in the rocking chair. 

“Shh…it’s okay baby, Mama’s here with you,” her soft voice murmured as she was allowed this brief moment to be with her child, to let him know how much she missed him and cared for him before she had to go away again. 

He smelled so good to her, smells of powder and lotion wafting up in the air that brought forth so many wonderful memories to her as she started to gently rock her son. Eve held onto Daniel tightly, for fear that this would all end too soon for her and she would be relegated back to what fate had dealt her, for her to belong in the realms of heaven instead of being with the child who meant the world to her. 

Daniel reached his tiny hand up to touch Eve’s face as she felt a tear slid down her cheek, such contentment she hadn’t found since she had left this earth many months ago. She kissed his hand and his chubby cheeks, knowing how precious this feeling was to her. Eve felt her heart swell with more love than she had thought possible and it radiated out to her son as he smiled and spoke, “Mama?” 

“It’s me,” Eve nodded as she whispered softly, “I love you so much Daniel. You don’t know how bad I miss you every moment that I’m not with you baby. I’d do anything if I could be with you all the time.” 

Daniel grasped one of her fingers in his hand, his fingers wrapping around her as he snuggled closer in her loving embrace, his cries a forgotten memory as he begin to relax in his mother’s arms. 

Eve began to softly hum to Daniel as she rocked him, then she started to sing him a lullaby for him to go back to sleep because she knew wouldn’t be able to leave him if he was awake. 

Dragon tales and the “water is wide” 
Pirate’s sail and lost boys fly 
Fish bite moonbeams every night 
And I love you 

Godspeed, little man 
Sweet dreams, little man 
Oh my love will fly to you each night on angel’s wings 
Godspeed 
Sweet dreams 

The rocket racer’s all tuckered out 
Superman’s in pajamas on the couch 
Goodnight moon, we’ll find the mouse 
And I love you 

Godspeed, little man 
Sweet dreams, little man 
Oh my love will fly to you each night on angel’s wings 
Godspeed 
Sweet dreams 

God bless mommy and match box cars 
God bless dad and thanks for the stars 
God hears “Amen” wherever we are 
And I love you 

Godspeed, little man 
Sweet dreams, little man 
Oh my love will fly to you each night on angel’s wings 

Godspeed 
Godspeed 
Godspeed 
Sweet dreams 

Eve’s voice trailed off as Daniel drifted off to dreamland again. His body totally relaxed as he fell into a deep and contented sleep after hearing his mother sing to him. Eve smiled down at her son, knowing how blessed she had been in her life with this wonderful gift from God. This sweet child was the best thing she had ever done in her life and she knew without a doubt what a true miracle he was to her. 

Eve bent down to kiss her son once more, then reluctantly got up from the rocking chair and gently placed him back into his bed. Gently tucking the blanket around Daniel’s sleeping form as she gave him one last look. 

“Thank you,” Eve whispered to the heavens, knowing her prayer tonight had been answered as she opened up the window and prepared to go. She closed her eyes to the night as the wind picked up in intensity and the stars twinkled in the distance while she disappeared from the room without a trace, grateful for this special memory of her son’s first birthday that she could cherish in eternity. 
 

*Song Godspeed (Sweet Dreams) written by: Radney Foster 
sung by the Dixie Chicks off of their Home cd